Donald J. Trump – Underneath The Smoke And Mirrors

Speculation has run rampant in recent years about just what's going on outside (as well as inside) the head of business/chick maggot, er, uh, magnate and Republican President Donald J. Trump.  Is his trademark coiffure and elaborate comb-over, hair plugs, a weave, or some weird, sci-fi combination thereof?  And why does he often appear tan to the point of being, well, orange -- is that coloration due to a spray-on tan, makeup, or just unusual skin coloration?

An image showing Donald Trump without his signature hairpiece and makeup outside his lavish estate have surfaced across social media.

Sources close to the Trump campaign report staffers are not sure who took and leaked the picture.

 The "leaked" photograph displayed above seemingly answers some of those questions, showing that Trump without a wig or makeup is... just another bald and pale senior citizen with a few wisps of white hair remaining on the top and sides of his pate and a kind of "You kids get off my lawn!!!" look to his countenance.

The image is just a digital creation, however, one that originated with on the Liberal Darkness website, publisher of such political spoofs as "Donald Trump Holds Unique Cheetos Contest to Help Find Running Mate" and "Gays Luring Pokémon-Go Players Into Homosexual Gyms."

Well, we can clearly see, his face IS orange, along with whatever the color of that stuff on the top of hes head is called.

And finally, we have a winner!  Look closely through the wispy, wimpy, aging and crotchety Grandpa-on-his-porch-at-the-end-of-the-street junk on his head.  Pretty much only Trump in all his vain glory would call that "hair". 

That initial picture of "old man Trump" at the beginning of this piece, that's how I imagine he really looks without the makeup and cheap hair dye.  It's actually a Photoshopped image, but you know, it just seems so real.