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Thursday, December 5, 2013

Service Animals, Companion Animals, and Pets

At what point did some genius decide that, sure, it’s okay for dogs and cats to come into the grocery store with me?

Oh, sure, we love out pets as though they were family members, but they are still animals.  It doesn’t matter if it’s a Service animal, Companion animal, or a pet.

No, it’s not okay, and in fact, it is a terrible idea.  Do you not have a single clue as to the germs that canines carry?

The grocery store incident actually happened, one morning in early December, 2013. 

I was strolling down the aisles, pushing my cart and noticed a 40ish woman and her white, fluffy dog.  Oh, yes, the dog was on a leash, but I couldn’t believe how casual the woman was, as though bringing Poopsie (that’s not the dog’s real name) with her to the store was the most natural thing in the world.

I asked her why the dog was with her, and why she’d felt the need to bring her dog into the store.

“He’s lonely, and I didn’t want him to be alone.”

I suggested leaving him at home, tying him up outside the store, or leaving him with a trusted friend.

“Oh, no, I could never do that.  He’s my baby.” 

I moved on because I could see that she was too far gone with her dog. 

I came across not one, not two, but four more women with various sized dogs, all on leashes (the dogs, not the women) during my shopping trip.  I tried to have similar conversations with them, simply pointing out that hygienically, this was a bad idea on their parts.  I shrugged my shoulders, gave a heavy sigh, and just quickly finished my shopping.

So, who is really to blame here?  Well, first the irresponsible dog owners for thinking this was a good idea, but secondly, the politicians that wrote the A.D.A. law, prohibiting merchants from inquiring as to the nature of the animal in the first place.

Apparently, a store owner, transit (bus, light rail train) employee, and others are not allowed to “question” these animal owners as it might keep their disability status from being anonymous.

If you have a “Service” animal, it helps specifically with your disability, i.e., seeing-eye dogs, helper monkeys, and so on.

A “Companion” animal is specifically for aiding with your diagnosis, i.e., chronic depression, anxiety, etc.  Typically, these animals help calm the person down, and assist with those types of issues.

“Pets”, well, that’s a pretty easy one; these are the animals that we take into our lives and consider them to be family members.

Service animals provide a service for their owners.

Companion animals act as companions primarily for comfort.

Owners of both Service and Companion animals should be required to have a vest, collar, or other indicator on their animals at all times.  The only “stigma” associated with these are the ones that the owners of these animals place on themselves.

Think about others first.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Slackers, and Saggers, and Drag Queens. Oh my!



Slackers can sag, but rarely do drag,
And saggers can slack but not with handbags.
Drag Queens can slack but they never sag,
And slackers can drag but not when they sag.



Now, Drag Queens can slack,
If they have the knack,
Although not in a garbage sack colored jet black.



Saggers can do drag,
Wave a rainbow flag,
But not after the red-eye flight with jet lag.


Slackers can do drag,
Make puppy tails wag,
Not when they’ve sprayed themselves all over with Tag.



Slackers can slack,
Saggers they sag,
Drag Queens can do drag, wave flags with jet lag…
… the Drag Queens, not the flags!

However, if the flags came from Singapore, 
And arrived at a quarter to four, they’d have jet lag,
And for sure, start to sag.